So I'm having a major exam this year. 

SPM, which is like the A-levels in Malaysia. 

And hence, tough tough tough tough tough year. 

So anyone who's reading, do pray for me and my fellow schoolmates that we find the strength to go through this year. 

Can't believe we're in our last years of high school already! 

Day 30: A picture of someone you miss.

Christopher Lee Fah

My grandfather.

Although he passed away when I was only 4 years old, and I don't really have vivid memories with him, his life and his stories were passed on to me from my mother. 

Every now and then, my mom would always talk about her very eccentric father, the Jack of all trades. He built the house that my aunts and uncles grew up in, he installed the first elevator in Sabah and he managed to bring up 8 kids with the monthly salary of less than RM1000. 

Not only that, I also knew that he loved to travel and have been to many places except for China and Macau, his hometown, which he planned to but sadly didn't have the chance.

The reason why I miss him is because I never really got to know him. I wished I did. I wish he could bring me to his fishing trips or let me wear his cowboy hat (which is now on my mom's shelf) or at least tell me some of his stories from the days back then.

Sighs. Kung, I wish I could recall at least a memory of us together, but I never could. I only remember you scolding me for not saying "excuse me" when I tried to walk pass old people.Well, at least there's something I can remember you by. 

Even though we weren't as close I wish we were, I still miss you. 

I know it took longer than expected to finish this challenge, but this is Day 30. 

Honesty and good things that come with it..

(well, not necessarily) 

For several years, I have had troubles being honest with myself and with others.
I wasn't being dishonest to mock or hurt anyone, but merely for the sake of everything. Or so I thought.

Just recently, I realised how rewarding it is to be honest for a change. I've managed to escape from a "would-be" terrible relationship and somehow ended up on the brighter side of the rainbow.

The truth does hurt but like the tumblr posts with words on it says "Hurt me with the truth, but don't comfort me with a lie." I know that a lot of people are afraid to tell the truth because they might not be able to accept the outcome of it, trust me, I am one of those people but learn to choose the right words to put it out there and maybe the outcome isn't as bad as it seems, might even be better. 

Seriously, if you don't, it'll slowly eat you up from the inside and by the time you decide to let it out, it might not be pretty. Friends, lovers and family members should try to be honest with each other. I'm not saying it will be easy.

And to the friends, lovers or family members, if he/she is trying to be honest and what they say might be hurtful, do try to forgive them for they are trying to honest, for sure, you have something to say about them too.

A simple reminder though, a secret, when bestowed upon you is meant to be kept as a secret. Sharing it out to the whole world isn't an act of honesty but rather an act of betrayal of trust.
Do learn to differentiate this. 

Chapter 17: 20 days and counting

Waddddupppp?!

So following my end-of-2012 post, of course I had to say something about 2013, no matter how much I don't want to think about it, but I had to.

2013 huh, we survived the apocalypse. (I've always wanted to say that)
And because of that, I have to face the biggest exam in my life so far, SPM.
The one exam that will determine the type of university I'll get into and ultimately decide my future. So there's a whole lot going on this year.

Besides the exam, I have SUKMA too. I have set it as my goal to win a medal this year as I know deep down, it would be my last year to qualify for the Malaysian Games.

So in that few short sentences, it is probably clear how heavy this year will be and how I will be stressing about it. But! I decide not to over-stress myself this time around and take one day at a time and just try to enjoy my last year in high school. Yes, it is my last year. *sobs sobs*

Seeing it as I'm turning 17 in 20 days (not really excited about it), I might as well make a few "new year" resolutions for myself, even though I never actually accomplished any resolutions so far.

These are some of them:
1) Eat 5 portion of fruit each day
2) Oats and yoghurt for breakfast
3) Take care of my face
4) Train hard and focus
5) Weekly run at the lake
6) Save money for movies (Despicable Me 2, Monster's Inc. 2, G.I. Joe, Percy Jackson and Disney's version of Star Wars)
7) Be nicer and friendlier to people
8) Just study hard

I could go on and on about my resolutions or goals or whatever you call them but I really don't want to make promises I know I can't keep and one of them would be blogging. I'm not sure if I'll have much time to keep this blog alive but I will really try my best.

In the famous words of Simple Minds,

"Don't you forget about me"

Ending 2012

*was supposed to post this up before the New Year but since it's 2013 already, I decided to start from scratch*

So 2012 ended pretty quick for me, probably because I had so many things to look forward to.
I'll start off with my 2 weeks in St. Catz for the ORA Summer programme which is still the highlight of my life. It was such an amazing experience and it was worth failing Bio for.
Met so many amazing people over there in St. Catz, some which I know will be great in the future :)

Then two weeks after coming back from UK, I was back in training for the National Cadet and Junior Championship, which was a huge shock for me cause I expected to get a medal for the U-17 category but instead got a bronze for the U-21. Trust me, even my coach didn't see that coming.

Oh right in the middle of it all, Tom Daley won an Olympic Bronze ;) 

But before that, my beloved grandaunt passed away, which brought a dark cloud over my mum's side of the family for quite a while. She was like my second grandmother, always there with her warm smile and her delicious sago pancake. I miss her so much.

For the rest of the year, it was mostly schoolwork and exams. It was my first year as a senior and I was lucky to have survived that. I was so blessed to be in an amazing class for 2012 (SENIOR ONE XIAO!) and I couldn't have asked for a more better class. It sure is sad that we are all separated this year. :(

Oh right, 2012 was also the year of standing in the crowds, screaming and singing along to artists :D So I managed to catch Anthony Neely, Pixie Lott (Thanks so much Heidi!) and also join in the fun at the HitzKK Birthday Invasion (Thanks so much Laura!) and also, I was lucky enough to be invited by my lovely sister to meet Sungha Jung just a few weeks back :)

During the long year-end break, I went to work for 3 weeks, ended up getting paid half than expected, which was a bit unfair considering I did everything my boss asked me to. Oh well, this is the injustice of the underpaid and overworked.

Then it was Caroling season! I had tons of fun caroling with Jude's Hobbits and the CLOW ministry and it totally build up the spirit towards Christmas.

A week before the big day, I flew to Paris for a few nights stay (DISNEYLAND!) and then went back to Oxford where I spent Christmas with my family and London where I finally went to Tower Bridge.
Reached home just in time for the NYE's countdown at grandma's and for the first time in a long time, spent the New Year's with my eccentric family.

All in all, 2012 wasn't as bad as I thought it will be.

Well, 2013, I'd be happy if it was half as good as last year.